Love and the Professional Identity of the Childcarer? Part 1 (of many I imagine).

How does love fit with being a Professional Childcarer?


Several themes are beginning to emerge from my data collection, one of which is a desire for a working definition love. The following comments are a few from the first round of interviews which I have conducted which suggest that staff are keen to demonstrate the love they have for the children but remain reluctant because of a lack of definite understanding of what love means for them in childcare.

"because there are different definitions of love but probably because it has never been put together with professionalism in the care sector"

"well if you think cradle to the grave, people working in a nursing home , it's the same kind of thing. And I am sure they (the staff) probably love them (the residents) in the same way because they are caring for them, making sure their needs are met, but that word "love" is just danced around and is kind of out of the omission because would we need an explanation of it (love)?"

"I don't agree that you would love the children in the same way as you would love your family or your would love your own kids, if you had children, I don't think you would love them in the same way."

"I think it (love) means different things to different people"

"there are different definitions of love"

"I love my family, the grandchildren, you know but my playgroup children, there is a sort of (love) a well I suppose there is, as I really look forward to seeing them coming in, chatting to them and you know, yeah, but it is a different kind (of love)."

"It is different, because when you are doing it in a nursery and I've known staff that can't separate what is professional and what is personal (love) but you have to, if you do your job well, you have to know that you can love these children..."

This has made me start to question what might a definition look like that would give staff the confidence and freedom to say that they love the children they work for. Participants seem to struggle with the conflict between their love for the children in their care and the love that they have for their children and their families. This is something which I am going to examine further in the second round of individual interviews which I am going to conduct with participants of the study.

Page (2016) posits a definition of Professional Love and has developed a tool for staff to think about Professional Love.


















I like this tool as it sets out to encourage practitioners to step back from what their ideas of love are and to become self aware. I imagine that Page wants them to become aware of their own experiences of love, their own hang-ups around love, their own practise when it comes to love. She then goes onto explain how the practitioner should stop focusing on their own emotional needs and begin to emotionally invest in the child that they are caring for. This way they will gradually build up a reciprocal and authentic relationship within which love compliments that of the parent's love. Despite 56% of practitioners in Page's study (2011) saying they weren't really concerned about what parents thought, this fits well with some of what my participants have been saying, that they are still concerned with how the parents interpret this love and if they and the parents could be convinced that their love sits side by side then perhaps this would free practitioners up to demonstrate that love freely. It is my intention in the second phase of my data collection to interview parents to ask them what they think of "professional love" and if indeed that is how they would recognise it. Because I often wonder if the concerns are real or if they are perceived concerns. The only way to find out is to ask some parents.

Where my research follows on from Dr Page's research is that I am looking at the Early Years Lead Professional, in Scotland, and where love fits in with the identity of the newly emerging Professionals. The Workforce reform in Scotland has created a highly skilled and knowledgeable workforce which has a deep understanding of what holistic development means for children in their early years. The Scottish Government make that point in the Blueprint for 2020 Action Plan (2017:2) that "there are few more important jobs than caring for, and educating, our youngest children" it would seem therefore crucial that we take examine fully the professional identity of the Early Years Lead Professional. Love is generally not recognised as a professional value in most professions, however, as Page's study and my own, shows there is an appetite for discussion around love in the early years. Several themes are developing in my research which are around language, experiences of love and why people find it difficult to fully embed in practice. Most professionals in my study fully recognised the importance of love for early development but many are still unsure about whether it is "professional" or not to demonstrate that love fully.

Many of the participants also struggle with what "love" is. Many saying that the love they feel for the children in their care is somewhere between "family love" and "professional love". A few suggesting names like "background love", "familiar love", child-carer love" as a way of getting to grips with what it is. They are concerned about using the word love as it has so many different meanings to so many different people in society. I carried out a pre-interview questionnaire which asked the participants to discuss what they thought were the meanings of a number of different types of love as set out in Sternberg's (2006) Duplex Theory of Love. They were asked to consider Intimacy, Passion and Decision/Commitment and whether they thought these were present in the different kinds of love. They were given a definition of what these words mean (from the dictionary):

Intimacy - closeness, connectedness, bondedness, loving relationships.
Passion - drives that lead to romance, physical attraction, sexual consummation BUT also self-esteem, nurturing, affiliation, self-actualization.
Decision/Commitment - Short-term decision that one loves a certain other. Long-term commitment to maintain that love.

Interestingly, from a rudimentary look at the results, Child-carer Love and Family love came out as having the same emotions - Passion and Commitment. However, when questioned about Intimacy many felt that whilst the relationship they did have with children were absolutely based on bonds, closeness and connectedness they would never say they had an intimate relationship with the child. Discussions led us to consider the use of language and what meanings different words have to society. But one Lead Practitioner said that she recognised that in order to change nappies, soothe to sleep fractious babies you could only have an intimate relationship but she would never say that out loud. This use and understanding of language really fascinates me. And one which I am keen to explore further.

One of my participants sent me a link to a study by the Children's Parliament which was called "Imagining Aberdeen" which resulted in a report called "School should be a joyful place" (Children's Parliament, 2016). In that report the children who were involved in the study made comment that "adults should say things like 'I love you'". This made me even more determined to find a way to bring the love back into childcare, to give staff permission to love the children they care for openly and confidently, without doubt in their emotions.

Understanding exactly what love means and how it fits in with the care that is provided in services will support Lead Practitioners in supporting staff in demonstrating the love they have for the children in their care. Page (2016) suggests that "it is the debate and theorisation of love and care that is important" and Sternberg and Weis (2006) make the point that "if we wish to fully understand love, we must understand it and all it's aspects". This is not an easy task, love is a complex emotion. But I've got to start somewhere.

So what next in my study? My data collection continues. I am following through on three themes:

1. How does personal experience of love influence professional practice with young children?
2. Why is it so difficult to discuss and embed in practice?
3. What should we call the love that childcare's have for children in their care?

I am also arranging to speak to parents to find out what they think? Should love be a professional standard?

Busy few weeks ahead of me....

Reference List

Children's Parliament (2016). "School should be a Joyful Place" Learning and school life in Scotland: A Children's Parliament Report. Imagining Aberdeen. Children's Parliament.

Page, J (2016). Role of 'Professional Love' in early years settings studied by University of Sheffield researchers. http://professionallove.group.shef.ac.uk/attachment-toolkit/thinking-about-professional-love-tool/ (accessed 22/3/17).

Page, J (2011). Professional Love in Early Years Settings: A Report of the Summary of Findings. The University of Sheffield.

Scottish Government (2017) A Blueprint for 2020: The Expansion of Early Learning and Childcare in Scotland. Scottish Government: Edinburgh.

Sternberg, R J and Weis, K (2006). The New Psychology of Love. Yale University Press: New Haven and London.